It seems to me that many caregivers of the elderly spend a lot of time complaining. I read forums about caregiving, and complaints are the main topic. Caregivers complain about how they are not appreciated by the loved ones, how their siblings or spouse do not help them, how they just can’t wait until they can get a life they imagine they could have. These complaining caregivers imagine they could have a better life, be more independent, have more money to spend, have more time, and do what they want if only they could be free of caregiving. If only……
The comments of caregivers on some website forums boil over with resentment, depression, and suppressed anger. The people who are posting are not seeking solutions. They seem to say, “You think you got a complaint? Listen to mine. It will top yours!” Maybe some are seeking revenge for childhood or teenage injustices, mistreatment, or minor slight from the patient long ago.
I think its depressing to read such words. Even more depressing to realize that there are hurting people behind those words. Those that are hurting are the complaining caregivers, of course, but also their patients or loved ones . If you are such a patient, how can you not know that the caregiver you live with resents caregiving for you, and wishes you were gone. If you are one of the complaining caregivers, you know that you are not the best you could be.
For further reading, check out Choosing Caregiving
Challenge to Change
I want to challenge those complaining caregivers: Get off the forum. Just stop using that forum and visiting that website. Stop feeding on the anger, resentment, depression and self-pity that you find on those websites. Stop posting there and stop reading the other postings. Get away from complainers who only drag you down.
Get positive. That’s the advice I am giving caregivers: BE POSITIVE. Stop feeding yourself negatives. Start finding the positives in life. You will increase your appreciation of your blessings. You will improve your attitude and your mental health.
Find some positive thought websites where you benefit from some encouragement, some inspiration, and take some positive action that makes a difference. Here are some suggestions for complaining caregivers. Websites that can provide some attitude improvement.
Try These Positive Thought Websites
- Guideposts has a whole section about caregiving with positive articles from caregivers. Reading these you will be able to relate to caregivers who are making the best of their situations with some spiritual help.
- Your Attitude + Your Choices = Your Life
- Inspiration served with a heavy dose of reality
- Small Acts That Change the World. Read their Stories of Kindness from Around the World and look at their Kindness Ideas by Category. Be inspired to be kind.
- News That Inspires Internet news that is ad-free and full of good news from around the world.
- The Good News Network is an American online newspaper which publishes positive and uplifting news stories.
- Get some inspiration by mail by signing up for the Christopher News Notes. The Christophers’ motto is “It’s better to light one candle than to curse the darkness.”
So, here is your candle, complaining caregivers. Go light up your world for good. Be positive.